Daughter of the risen one! (:

September 26, 2010

Mixed emotions in one day.

Filed under: Blibical, Random crap (:, Rantings — Tags: , , , , , , — CynthiaAcacia @ 12:51 am

Gek Kee, Jia Jin and Jia Jin’s friend Emily came tertiary service today~
Lmao I keep remembering Emily as Vivien :/
Hahahs, but congrats on joining West family (: heh I’m literally an ex-West =.=
You converting brought hope into me, God taught me there is still hope.
And that He is still going to work in me.
Ate Popeye’s two piece chicken.
Lmao. Shreedhee told me he’s there I look everywhere in the end just beside me -.-
Ok so lame and dumb. But just imagine my happiness >:)
Today Eliton smiled at me WAHAHAHHAHAHAHA xD (Y)
I think he smiles like a kid heheheehehe.
Saw Bernard studying at SMU? NUS? hahahha. I like his voice >:)

I have a headache from lack of sleep :/

Tomorrow going Science centre to volunteer again with two out of all my favourite people in my life (:
Hahhas Shermy and Kwan kwan ^^ Touched not HAHAHAH.
Hmmm, I guess my definition of favourite people are people I will never mind spending time with? :)
LOLs they are people I will go all out for without anybody telling me to.
Hehe. And well, I think less than 10 in my life hahahha.
I dread Science centre >:( But I’m looking forward to sharing life with them (:
Lmao, Science centre makes me think of what Shermy and I experienced yesterday HAHAH.
His middle finger got stuck in a ring LOL. I had to literally use force to pull it out.
Lmao, it will be funny if he had to buy the ring.

I was broke down today. I hate being not trusted. I hate being doubted.

It’s more heart breaking when you’ve put the past aside while the person still holds strongly to it.
It’s irritating to get said and pulled down when all you did was do God’s work.
These are the people in my life that made me stop and scream why!
WHY am I still doing God’s work with all these ungrateful people around?
Persecuted for doing G’s work by yor own brother in spirit?
That sucks really. You want to clarify, but you hold back.
Cause why would you listen? You never did listen.
I refuse to get pulled down by you anymore.
No matter how many times I say I don’t want to have anything to do with you anymore, I know I can’t.
Cause even though I dislike you, I cannot not do God’s work.
This is a contrast between my mouth and heart.
Why would someone just go back and get hurt over and over again?
Get pulled down over and over again?
That feeling, is persecution.
Persecuted for doing God’s work.
I thought and thought, I cannot comprehend why you must live in the past actions.
But just to let you know, I really do love God and His people deep down.
That shapes me inside no matter how you view me from the outside.
You know, the feeling sucks. But it made me think deep.
And I realised why I serve God, why I do what I do.
I really love Him and His people, His kingdom is more important than what I think.

Didn’t go home with WeiLoong today :( Sad.

SEE WEILOONG! I’M SAD. You break my HEART LOL :P
LOL, but haha I really like going home with you la :) LOL.
Kwan was celebrating his friends’ birthday so.. :/
I went home with GekKee, JiaJin and Emily instead hahaha.
LOL, Emily ): Q hair and bui here and there HAHAHAH.

September 5, 2010

Mixed.

Filed under: Blibical, Random crap (:, Rantings — Tags: , , , , , , , , — CynthiaAcacia @ 2:25 pm

3 different stories, 3 different emotions.

1) Yesterday, God told me:

Seek first my Kingdom and all will be given and added to you.

He showed me a glass heart, inside it was a castle. This represented the Kingdom of God. It’s just like the story of the small, large and medium rocks. We should always put the large rocks in before putting the medium and small rocks, if not all rocks will not be able to fit in.

 

The Kingdom of God is like the largest rock. If we are to experience the glory and promises of God to its fullest, we have to put the castle in first, into our hearts. In the middle of our lives. Then followed by all the other things. If we are to put other things first, it is impossible to fit in the castle. Because it’s so big, and many a times when Christians cry out to God that He is not as into their lives as God wants them to be, are they willing to sacrifice other priorities for the biggest priority? Are they willing to put the Kingdom of God first? Are they willing to take a leap of faith and make the sacrifice?

Many a times God has told us again and again, that He will add to the faithful and obedient, God will definitely not shortchange you. He will definitely reward you hundredfold, thousandfold of what you had sacrificed. And many a times it just comes to us as hey, if I didn’t sacrifice what was good in those days how could I have had the best? Vice versa if you did not put God first in your life.

God cannot fully work in us without our permission because of free will, if you do not allow God to be in the centre of your life, how can your life be of a powerful vessel? 

2) Thanks WeiLoong for being so kind as to walk me back to a place where I can recognise. I have no doubts that your future prospective wife/girlfriend or current heart throb LOL will find you to be of a haha well I don’t know. But I guess you’re one of the better guys I’ve ever seen. Zzz, that’s a compliment HAHA. Well, I keep saying: What the. LOL influenced by Shreedhee. I really thank God that I’m currently a CD instead of the past me being a DC. If not, I would have clashed head-on with Yicong HAHA. And I’m sure we’ll be of a match (Or I’d probably be able to win either way and piss her off in the process) so neither will win which will result in conflicts, WWIII. But now, I would just be of a slacker when she domineers. Which is a good thing I guess. Yicong rarely backs down when she domineers. Zzz haha ok just like me. LOL. Except that I’m so prideful that I will consider who the person is before I consider stepping back (: Another of a good thing is that I don’t really mind her doing it, as she never oversteps the line or makes me feel threatened haha. Which I guess, is lucky. Or, we’ll be just the next generation of enemies lol. Yea, God’s plan is great! Thank God, I don’t like conflicts. I just can’t help it when I feel threatened haha. I’m like a forever PMS-ing kid ): Leanne’s sick btw, she’s having chicken pox. Aww, I’m immune to it already ahha. I remember getting mine in K2. Itchy ): Ah well, I guess it’s better for her to have it now than to have it nearer to her wedding. That will be kind of a sad thing. The myth of a cross is a book that a Muslim wrote to expose the supposedly “flaws” of the bible. Haha aww, I think some of the questions are really just pinpointing and some are really well, use brain can answer le but Zzz, I’m able to answer them. Kana tricked by the title -.- I thought it was a Christian book. Never mind, it will get my brain working anyway.

3) Few days back, I have had a bad experience with a particular person. My conscience is clear, I did nothing wrong to incur your wrath. You may love them a lot as you claim but if something as silly as a bad memory of remembering your favourite stars names is to destroy a friendship, I don’t think you’re a good friend to me. Seriously. That’s just a stupid, naive excuse. I did not attack your group although I do not have a preference for Korean star or stars for that matter. Really, don’t you think I have better things to do and worry about? Do you think I did it on purpose? If I did, may God punish me for my judgmental heart. But I didn’t, I go through as much as loving you as a friend thus didn’t comment anything on your favourite stars group although seriously speaking, its idolism. Oh what do you care about it anyway, to you I’m just stupid not to like Korean idols. And you should know I not only mix up their names I mix up other people’s names too, is it my fault that I’ve been born this way? I even mix up my name sometimes, is mercy not to be shown on me? Did you really had to go that far as to insult me with vulgarities? It hurt me, it really did. And I thought friends would be more important that idols. But I was wrong wasn’t I? This is an unmerciful world. Was Jesus ever wrong to say that? Sometimes, people think christian doctrines are plain crap and full of shit. I would like to say it just holds the truths and is reflective of who humans really are today. People just don’t like being exposed of their flaws.

August 22, 2010

Wish upon the stars

Filed under: Random crap (: — Tags: , — CynthiaAcacia @ 1:11 am

Talked to WeiLoong about like all the random things.

 They made me do chicken and monkey over and over again ):
Cross-eyed LOL. They can’t do it haha.
WeiLoong kept saying after Kwan left that
someone is really a nice, kind, caring and sweet person HAHA.
Rare times where we both agree with each other.
LOL ok it’s a guy, not in RP LOL.
LOL ok WeiLoong stop making me feel jealous ):
But thanks for accompanying me to get off the train and wait for next train.
LOL cause Sir Kah Wee inside >< (Sir Desmond got off at JE)
These are the times I find you not BAD HAHAH
I know I know la WeiLoong -.- He’s a very good guy, very RARE.
Glad you know HAHAH. Aiya, but really very rare.
He’s indeed a man of God.
Know what I see in him? It’s that. I saw what your all (GIRLS) failed to see.
And judging by that,
he’s already 528976123890 times better than any guys ya even Koreans LOL.
Ok WeiLoong I don’t have that fortune man ):
WeiLoong says I’m a domineering person -.-
So naturally need to find someone that can domineer over me,
without me feeling threatened.
Ok that’s quite hard to achieve HAHAHAH.

These are the times where I wished I was older.

August 1, 2010

Tell me God.

Filed under: Blibical, Random crap (: — Tags: , , , — CynthiaAcacia @ 10:21 pm

hahha. In your face Ethan Tan WeiLoong!

I’ve been wondering how sad/happy/emotionless

I will be when he gets himself a girlfriend.

Will I be sad? How sad will I be?
Will I be over him before that happens?
Will I harbour a hate?
Heh, I find myself amusing.
I can be so selfish.
So to all the people out there who keeps telling me I am selfless,
here’s the truth.
I can be extremely selfish that you will hate me to the core.

People find it wierd that I will like such a guy.

But hey, what’s there to not like about him?
He has fulfilled every quality I have listed down.
And he has enforced those first few quality so strongly that I am amazed.
And to think that I thought I have set impossible expectations.
Not out-of-the world physical looks and all that,
but that powerful inner beauty.
Why not him?
But hey God, I don’t know about you.
Maybe he’s not for me. Maybe.

Funny how I oppose relationships that form at a young age,

but constantly find myself liking guys so much older than me.
Hey, to the world 5 years age gap already is old.
How about 7.
I think it’s a wonderful age gap.
I always thought so. But oh well.

God, I been thinking hard as well,

how am I going to persuade my tuition teacher to release my brother fixed tuition timing?
I have done that with her younger daughter,
she’s bound to tell me what Jesus has done to her daughter.
It’s true the change is not as big as she might have expected,
it might not be prominent now.
I cannot directly influence her now either,
since we’re in different services..
But God how!
A child cannot experience change if he/she hardens her/his heart towards God.
My brother goes only for the sake of entertainment.
And even now, he’s tired of the food there.
He’s becoming more aware of money.
God tell me how!
What am I to do, how I wish God that he will understand.
 

Anw God, at 5am tomorrow,

I’m going to start walking to the park.

See you there, please God. Tell me how.

June 20, 2010

WEILOONG ♥

Filed under: Blibical, Random crap (: — Tags: — CynthiaAcacia @ 2:47 am

HAHHAH.
Heys :) Thanks so much for talking to me today.
I felt better after all these harvoc.
Thanks also for telling me my strength and weakness as well :D Hahahha
Ethan Tan Wei Loong- says (2:12 AM):

oh.
HAHA.
i share to you ba!
to me,
you’re still someone that is mouldable and willing to change from what i feel.
one that is also sensitive to others,

 

After talking to you, I felt refreshed.
Hahah, really lei, too bad I’m not a guy.
If not sure find you be my mentor HAAAHAH.
Hey, thanks so much for having faith in our batch of year ones.
Thanks for having faith that our batch will be the one who will lead RP to growth.
I think Kwan’s really lucky to have you as a shepherd ^^
Don’t worry I will kick his butt for you first if he backslides LOL.
Thanks so much for always making me smile and feel better :D
Hahha like kwan you are always lame and all that.
Irritating but it entertains me as well.
I can never be angry at your for long. LOL.
despite you keep saying that you’re unwilling, but i can tell that you want to change for the better and will do it.  

Thanks thanks thanks x345678987654345678 for believing in me! =D

Just watch me ;D I will rise! 

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